Chance of a second life? What would you do?

A question about : Chance of a second life? What would you do?

A bit overdramatic but still!!! I have just sold my business at last and that and the serious health scare, both of which have been hanging over me for the past few years, have now been lifted - for good I hope. I feel really elated, as if I have been given a second bash at life but instead of mortgages, children, schools, jobs, husband etc as first time around, this time I can do something completely different. I don't want to slip into the same old same old routine, even if it is a new routine, but want to make the most of this great feeling and do something.

I do have some plans, I have a part time job 3 days a week which I enjoy and need the income from, I also do voluntary work. I'll keep those on. I'd like to attend nightclasses but at the moment a 10 mile drive to the town on a winters night (or day!) does not appeal, so as the long term aim is to move to the town, I'll put that on hold. I don't need to earn any more money than I do, I have my state pension and a couple of other pensions, not a lot but enough - don't need more than that. I remember reading Ilona's blog a while ago and was attracted by some of the things, bus trips etc, that she did. Will spend this evening reading that all back, she's a real inspiration but at the time I felt I couldn't follow suit as I was either needed at the business or should be at home worrying about the business! Either that or worrying about side effects of medication etc, what a waste of energy!! Free from that now and the sale has given me a little financial cushion. I intend to view the local town as a tourist, and on Thursday will go to tourist info, get some town walks leaflets and go exploring, instead of quick dash to Aldi and the bank and home again. And I also intend to do lots more reading, and not just bank statements and invoices!!!

But I need more inspiration!!

So what would you do?

DS

Best answers:

• Join your local U3A, you'll find that you could do something everyday, fun or intellectual or a combination of the two.
  You make new friends, too.
• U3A - yes , excellent idea, why didn't I think of that!!! Will investigate. I'm not a great joiner of groups but maybe in my second life I should turn into a more sociable person. I do like to walk on my own or with my dog but who knows, I can give it a go. As far as U3A is concerned, I love listening to an interesting speaker and I know that's something they do.
  Thanks for the ideas, would love some more.
• Hello Downshifter, welcome to the wonderful world of freedom. Talking of interesting speakers, could you be an interesting speaker? I have done talks for years on my work, now I speak on Frugal Living, something else I am passionate about. I gave a talk to a U3A group which was a lot of fun, but I never felt inclined to join. I feel at 65 I am still too young.
  As you know I do a lot of walking alone, I'm not really keen on group walks. When I retired I had a day out as a tourist in my own town, using my new bus pass. It was lovely to wander around with no pressure to get back. Went to the museum and the arts centre, took photographs.
  I wish you well in your new life. Hey, why not write a blog about your adventures. Would love to read it.
  Best wishes, Ilona. aka Meanqueen
• Hi
  I would ask at your local library to see what clubs/groups are active in your area. You could also have a look in the hobbies section to see if there is anything there that appeals.
  Personally I would slow down a bit, as the poem goes "What is this world if full of care we have no time to stand and stare". Allow yourself a bit of time just to do nothing, take slow walks or just pack a picnic lunch sit on a bench and watch the world go by.
  Hope you find something that suits you.
• I started a new hobby, so relaxing and fulfilling for me. I learnt from scratch and have been to shows and some classes. I can choose whether to work on my own or to join other like-minded people and my hobby is expanding my life and I am making friends with similar interests. My new hobby is spinning and now also weaving and I now own 3 lovely wheels. My dh did similar but re a completely different hobby and he now meets up with new friends and has learnt wonderful new skills, developing an outstanding talent. We both go at our own pace and get out as much or as little as we want. U3A is not appealing to me, I know a few people who are involved and it is too much `in your face` for me
• What a great problem to have! I'm not retired but have a few friends that are and both have found a passion by thinking back to their childhood and teenage years along the lines of "what did I really want to do then? what did I enjoy doing? what would I have done if I could have earned a living doing it?" So one is now really involved in her local art group - not only a weekly class but they do weekend trips, walks, etc. The other had always loved horses (but her family couldn't afford to send her for lessons) so she now volunteers with a charity that enables disabled people to ride - she LOVES it.
  Good luck!
• U3A in your face?
  I don't understand that. We have 40 groups, from learning a language, or keeping one up, via book and poetry groups, bowls, walking, archaeology, wine apprecciation, birding etc.
  Some are small, chatty groups, others like social history are big groups. However, if someone wants to just sit and listen to a speaker that's fine.
• I am on my 2nd V2L course and I too do some volunteering and I am in the process of becoming an RSPCA branch trustee. Good luck
• The most important thing is that you do something that you really want to do. Reading what other people would do is great, and can be inspiring - but I also think you should sit down quietly, and give yourself time to think about what kinds of things you really really want to do - it might be completely different from what anyone out here in mse land might want to do.
  So - make a nice cup of tea and switch off the TV, screens etc, and spend some time thinking about what you want for you.
• Thanks to everyone who has taken the time and trouble to respond to this, and yes, hi Ilona, aka Meanqueen, I came across your story on the Downthelane forum and have hankered after a similar free lifestyle - now's my chance. I have done some sitting around quietly and thinking, but don't really know what I like doing to be honest. I don't have hobbies and the conclusion I have drawn is that I am basically a lazy glutton. I haven't lazed around in front of the telly with chocolates and wine for a very very long time until just a few days ago and boy, could I get used to that!!
  In my teenage years all I remember wanting to do was marry Paul McCartney, and I don't want him now, (I'm only 63 and he's an old man, but I didn't see that at the time!)so that puts paid to teenage dreams. I loved being a mother, having an allotment and getting my degree along with a subsequent engrossing career but don't want to go back. Certainly don't want another husband, I wasn't an easy wife to live with!!!!! I have found a recent interest in off-grid self-sufficiency and have been doing some reading around that. There are a couple of talks coming up at the WEA that I shall go to on local history, albeit in evenings but they are one-offs so I'm looking forward to that. Unfortunately since people have been aware that I now have more time I have been asked to help with things, both voluntarily and extra hours at work. Maybe something I should practise is to say no!!
  Anyway, thanks for the ideas, my second life is still a work in progress but I want to be sure I don't drift through it - I definitely need a proper plan!!
  DS
• Even a bad plan is better than no plan
• Hi Downshifter, I was in love with Paul as well, not so sure now. If I'm going to cop off with a bloke he's got to be younger than me, with all his own teeth, (implants accepted), and a full head of hair.
  It's best to have some sort of plan, you might have another 30 odd years left, it would be an awful waste if you slobbed out in front of the tele for that length of time. In fact, I would suggest you get rid of the tele. Maybe try a new hobby, preferably one that gets you out and about. If you like animals and have a dog rescue centre nearby, you could volunteer for that.
  Good luck whatever you choose.
  Ilona
• You get out of U3A as much or as little as you want. I was only 56 when I joined but never felt it was a problem. I learnt some new skills such as croquet and Mah Jong and have met loads of lovely people.
• what is U3A never heard of it
• University of the Third Age - led by peers
• I wish you well in your new life, happy to hear you are looking forward to the new future you have. It really is a second chance, a gift to yourself.
  I also agree with U3A
  LL
• I am a U3A -er and love every minute of it You can join in as much or as little as you like I help run the local pub quiz team amongst other things, along with my knitting blankets for the third world children reading, history group,book club ,genealogy, and looking after 4 DGs after school (well three at the moment as the eldest recently went off to Uni.There are just not enough hours in the day for me and I retired 19 years ago.
• I am not much of a joiner either. I make myself join something but never feel that I fit in. I have considered U3A but the only thing I was interested in (Conversational French) was full in the area and the email I received wasn't the friendliest or the most encouraging so I didn't enquire further. I joined a club that has been on the go locally for nearly fifty years. To be honest, I find it boring and feel too young, at 63, to be doing what they do. I am lucky in that I can be in London in an hour by bus (free now) so intend to do the tourist thing with my husband. He lived in London all his life and I have lived around the area for 40 plus years but too busy working to explore much. I intend to get Groupon type vouchers and eat in as many restaurants as I can, lol.