Wife wants divorce, advice on my financial position

A question about : Wife wants divorce, advice on my financial position

Hi All,

It's come as an extreme shock but my wife of 3 years has said she doesnt feel the same anymore and wants to split up. She told me this on a recent holiday I took her away on, not great but rather than wallow i have accepted it and want to move on.

She bought a house 2 months before we got married (with joint funds for the deposit) and it was in her name only due to previous credit issues at my end which i'm in the process of putting right but obviously these things take time.

In the last 2 years, I've spent over Ј30,000 in cash on renovations, i have receipts for everything that has come out of my bank account, one bill of Ј17,000 transferred for the driveway and patio and other garden upgrades alone, new bathroom at Ј5,000, upstairs bedrooms at Ј6,500 plastering, carpets, building work, etc - it's over Ј32,000 in total since May 2013 and i've gone without to pay for all this and really worked very long hours, on top of that I have paid absolutely every single bill, she's had her full wage free every month. I've paid mortgage, both car payments, all bills, all living expenses, everything. Im sure some will say im a fool but as the higher earner and loving my wife, i had no issues in covering everything and allowing her to have her wage free each month. I've taken her on 3 holidays a year, expensive gifts, when I sit and think about it it's unreal, and i've probably been a very generous meal ticket but you live and learn.

Now, my question is this, the house is in her name, she says she wants to keep HER house, however she cannot raise the capital to pay me anything. The bank (her mortgage providers) have told her they wont release any money to her due to her low salary, the house is worth around Ј150,000 with Ј60,000 outstanding so roughly Ј90,000 in equity, yet they wont lend her anything.

I've told her, in the scenario that she cannot raise any capital to pay me off to allow me to go and start my life again, bearing in mind i've spent Ј30,000 in renovations and a further Ј30,000 in mortgage and car payments in the last 2 years alone, then i'll have to do it the legal way and hope a court will make her sell the house, she isn't interested in anything other than keeping the house and couldnt really care less whether i rot which is a bitter pill to swallow having this come out of the blue.

Any advice on what I would be entitled to (given the circumstances) and if anything, would be very helpful.

Many thanks

Best answers:

• First things first - any children? (yours, hers, together)
  How long did you live together, if at all, before marriage?
  Presumably the value of the house has increased since purchase given all the expenditure - by how much, would you estimate?
  Can you evidence the joint funds for the deposit, that you have met all mortgage/bills etc, and the justification for the house being in her sole name?
  The Wikivorce website & forum is very good, though you may need to consider a solicitor (because of the house ownership aspect).
• I know someone who was exploited in a similar way. Could you get a free half-hour or so with a specialist solicitor?
• First of all, you have what is called Home Rights.
  Read this:
  https://www.adviceguide.org.uk/englan...s_the_home.htm
  There are various options that you both need to consider.
  You can use a third party (a Family mediator) to help you sort these (cost a few hundred pounds - google for more information)
  or
  You can use a solicitor and the financial aspects will be sorted out as part of your divorce proceedings.
  Obviously the first option is much much cheaper.
• No real advice but just wanted to say good luck.
  HBS x
• I'm sure many a single lady would snap your hand off such is your generosity.
  Its all very well to be wise after the event but as others have said, the important thing is you are married and that gives you rights. You might not get your money back right now but in the long term you should be ok.
  Also keep calm,dont get involved in any arguments or argie bargy. Many a woman might procure a situation to have an unwanted man removed from the house under such circs.
• Get yourself an appointment with a solicitor pronto, you need immediate advice on what path to take so you can properly secure your investment in the property..
  Good luck
• Your a
  Thank heavens for receipts and bank statements eh?
  Move out as fast as possible.
  Solicitor contact only
  Good luck.
• Get yourself a solicitor asap.
  Also paying her Ј2k a month and living in a place in her name only that only cost Ј100k! You've been paying all the bills and then some!
• On a 100k place with a deposit, unless you have a 10 year mortgage, the payments should have been what? All of Ј500 given the current interest rates?
  Council tax, TV, utilities should still all come in for a grand a month so unless you were burning money or also covering the food bills it seems like a very uneven split.
  Get a solicitor on the case and protect your investment. Be sure to remove your nuts from her purse when you leave too!
• OK, first thing you need to do is register your matrimonial home rights via the Land Registry.
  Then see a solicitor.
  Be aware that in looking at your respective interests in the house, a court will look at the value of the property, and can consider what contributions you have each made.
  In your case, the deposit came from joint funds (did you contribute equally to those?) and you have each contributed since then.
  The start point will be an equal split, although an unequal split may be fair if one of you has contributed very substantially more, or if there are significant differences between your respective financial needs and resources (i.e. if one of you earns a lot more than that other)
  It would be possible for a court to order that the house is sold, if the two of you cannot work something out. It would be possible for you to offer a settlement whereby the house was to be sold but she has first refusal - and you could agree a time scale to give her the chance to raise the money, if you were willing to do so.
  You both remain entitled to live in the house in the mean time.