A question about : Where to start with a split...?
Hi, I hope you can offer some useful help and advice. I feel like my whole world is falling apart.
I've been married for a couple of years and have two beautiful children (age 1 and 3). However, after a few too many very bad arguments with my husband, I'm wondering if that for my own safety and sanity, and the health and happiness of my children, we'd be better off apart.
Since having our children, I now only work 18hrs a week (hubby's income supports us all, and my income is just to help ease the pressure and to keep my foot in the working world until our children are of school age). Therefore, I don't earn a great deal and my parents help to care for our children while I work and they're not in nursery (Both attend 15 hours a week - eldest child gets this free and and youngest child's fees are Ј300 a month - half my wage!).
What help, if any, am I entitled to? What are my options? I earn approx Ј10k per annum. Hubby earns approx Ј45k. There is equity in the house of approx Ј150,000, and he has substantial savings/investments (which I'm not privy to). I've tried to look on the gov.org website, but I'm finding the whole child tax credit/working tax credit too confusing and right now I'm having trouble remembering my own name nevermind anything else.
Where do I start if I want a divorce? Where do I start to look how much help I can get in the form of benefits? Hubby isn't even speaking to me at the moment, so a split will never be amicable. I imagine he will do everything in his power to make life as hard as possible for me. He'll just throw money at a solicitor to make sure I get as little as possible and I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to take my children away from me.
How do I go about finding somewhere else to live? I couldn't afford rent on my pittance of a wage, and I have nowhere else to stay. I can't stay living under the same roof as him if we do decide to split.
Best answers:
- https://www.relate.org.uk/home/index.html
https://www.gov.uk/divorce/overview - The above is possibly the best start for practical advice.
Hope it works out well for you and the wee ones whatever the situation. You've not said it specifically but if safety is an issue then do consider speaking to the police - 'safety' - all he did was push me two or three times. I say 'all', i know it's enexcusable. But he's never done anything like that before, and hopefully never would again.
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