Stop being a Wimp!... DMP Journey

A question about : Stop being a Wimp!... DMP Journey

For the last 2 years I have known that we have a problem but I have continued to try and pay all the bills, mortgage and CC's often using CC's to pay other things and withdrawing cash to keep us going.

My OH is a gardener so his work is very seasonal, plus we were shafted by a family member. This means that his income goes up and down all the time and sometimes down but not up!

Anyway, the time has come when I have to say I have been defeated by the CC's and cannot continue to pay them the amounts that I have been doing.

I posted that I was scared to take the next step down the CCCS and DMP route but have found that the people on this forum are wonderful and have given me the encouragement and strength to go through with this, instead of chickening out and carrying on further into the mire.

SO....

I have done the CCCS debt remedy and feel more positive already.

Tomorrow I am going to ask for a Co-op cashminder account - this bit is hard as I feel loyalty to my current bank???? - got to stop this and I'm sure when I default on the loan that I have with them I will change my mind!

Then need to speak to the CCCS and complete all the forms

Then maybe I can stop crying, worrying, stressing out, feeling sick, having headaches, feeling depressed and maybe the ringing in my ears will stop too!

So I'm going to update this diary with my progress and then look back in a couple of months to see if I feel better and whether I am in a better place financially. At the moment both myself & OH are throwing money at our debts but not making any inroads whatsoever and I want my life back!!

Best answers:

• Well that's it! I have finally pressed the SUBMIT button on the CCCS website. I have done the debt remedy numerous times but never had the courage to face up to my problems.
  This time I don't have a choice, it's either the submit button and go through with a DMP or it's the self destruct button as there is no way out.
  Do I feel better for doing this? Not at the moment, the feeling of impending doom is hanging over me and I can't shake it.
  Now I'm going to read through the other posts to keep me positive and sane and then I'm going to go to the bank and open a basic account (and try to stop feeling that I am being dis-loyal to my current bank)
  Thank you to everyone that has given me the courage to go through with this
• Well done - you have taken a very big step and you are bound to have those mixed emotions to start with.
  But as time goes on, and you realise the difference it will be making to your day to day life, the relief will kick in, and the sleep will return, and the sick feelings will disappear.
  There are so many people on this site doing DMPs and very little negative comment about them in general. I haven't done one myself so can't offer much in the way of specific comment, but I DO know that when you take control of your debt, as you have just done, the difference in your own strength and ability to deal with things is just amazing.
  So, run with the emotions right now, and enjoy the fact that you are now taking control of your situation.
  Good luck with it all!
• Thanks Hypno, Your comments are very much appreciated
• Right, scrap the loyalty to the bank bit... we are now going to be charged Ј50 for going 97p over our overdraft limit!!
• I think you will find that there is no such thing as loyalty to customers nowadays, so why should you be loyal to them?
  I would def ring up and ask about the possibility of removing the charge - that is certainly not a "fair and reasonable" amount.
• Thanks! I will definately try and get the charges waivered, it's my OH's business account, thats why the charges are so high
• Even if it is a business account, those charges are horrific!!
• Tomorrow a payment of Ј90 is due to one of our CC's and about now I would be doing everything to try and find the money to pay it but after our decision to go on a DMP I find I am not in the normal panic mode although I am still getting the odd "Oh !!!!, what have I done" thought. I have also taken to talking to myself "They can't have what I haven't got" mantra
  Just trying to keep calm and tell myself that we have done the right thing
• Hi Ellie
  They can't have what you haven't got. Good luck with it all
• Hi ellie
  Found you on here now how are you today? I too fell loyalty to Barclays but lets face it they dont give a S... abou you. You are just a number gone are the days when you use to sit and talk to your friendly Bank Manager.
  Hopefully the CCCS are writing to my creditors this week just now waiting to hear back
  Dont feel quite so good abou things today keep thinking about School Uniform, and how Im going to entertain the kids in the holidays.
  Husband still refusing to speak to me about DEBT he cant stay in denial for much longer.
  ANyway have a good day Jacxkie
• Hi Jackie,
  Yes, I thought that I would write a diary to keep a record of my progress, so that I can look back on it in the future.
  I understand the husband bit... mine understands how we have got to this point now (sort of) but his answer now is "why do you need to keep talking about it, I thought that we had decided what we are going to do" - this is one reason why I'm writing a diary, I need to view my thoughts and fears instead of bottling them up.
  Will you have some spare cash towards uniforms once you get paid, if so push this to the back of your mind for the next few days.
  The waiting bit is hard isn't it?
  Keep going Jackie - we are doing the right thing!!!
• Well managed to make sure that my car and the gas and electric are paid and now have 7 pence in my purse
  Not got Ј90 to pay CC due today They can't have what I haven't got!
  Need to ring CCCS when I get home tonight to see what I need to do now i.e. at what point to send out letters telling everyone that I can't pay them.
  Still need to open a new bank account - when I find the branch LOL
  Feel as though my mind is more on my job today - usually I am scouring this forum and looking for a solution - this time I am only looking in my lunch hour!!
  State of panic 7/10
• Hi Elliesleven
  Do you need to send them a letter I just sent them the notification of DMP that the CCCS sent me.
  Have paid Avon but have put another Ј10 ontop for late paymen OH JOY
  hAVE A GOOD EVENING jACKIE
• Hi Ellie
  Yes should have some spare cash for uniforms also going to Poole in Dorset on Sunday
  So that should take my mind of things for a few days at least
  Jackiexxxx
• Oh, Poole is nice. I was working down there a fair bit last summer, stayed in a lovely hotel near the harbour. Hope that you get some good weather and the opportunity to relax a little.
  I'm not sure whether I need to send a letter but I haven't had anything back from CCCS yet so wasn't sure what to do next
  So uniforms can go on the back burner for a little while at least?
  Speak soon and Take care
  Ellie xx
• Hi Ellie
  Yes when you get your pack they give you a letter to send to all your creditors with a notification they you are entering into a DMP.
  Wheter they take any notice who knows Vanquis didnt when they rung me the other day "oh we havnt received that letter".
  It took CCCS about 5 days to send stuff through
  Anyway cant pay Capital one for Wednesday so I bound to get a late payment fee on that one oh well!!!
  Have a good evening Jackiexxxx
• Oh, I see.. so I just wait for my pack before doing anything else?
  How are you feeling, has the panicky feeling gone and are you coming to terms with things? I feel a little calmer than I have for weeks but still getting the odd panic attack setting in every now and again.
  Still, I'm sure that when we get through these first few weeks we will be so glad that we have done this. I also wondered about budgeting and whether I would find this all too much and not able to cope living within a strict budget but when I think about the last weeks/months I realise that I have probably been living on a far tighter budget than is expected i.e. all money is used to pay debts, sometimes I go to work with nothing in my purse. I work away alot and last week I went to London with Ј1, now I don't know how I managed that, I couldn't even afford a drink whilst I was there!!
• Hi Ellie
  I minute I feel positive then the next I dont. I know I have done the right thing but have mixed feelings from people I have told. I Hve just looked in the frezzer no decent food in dont get paid till next week, having to lean on my huiband for money who keeps getting cross with me, telling me that I need to budget better.
  To be honest this is the worst thing he could say as I have done nothing but budget and not live properly for the last couple of years. I have Ј3 in my purse no petrol in my car and my roots need doing.
  We are doing the right thing im sure of it we could bury our heads in the sand for another couple of years but as I get older and wiser I want to start living again.
  I had to turn down an offer of a meal with my work collegues last week and made up and excuse because I didnt have enough money, and Im fed up with living like this.
  I THINK WE BOTH DESERVE TO START LIVING AGAIN EVEN IF WE HAVE A BUMPY RIDE
  ON THE WAY.
  Stay positive speak soon Jackiexxxx