Return to Solvency

A question about : Return to Solvency

Ok so I have finally plucked up the courage to start my diary. It's a really good way of recording the events that take place in my effort to finally become debt free after years of struggling and robbing Peter to pay Paul.

I had a mini LBM in 2007 following some traumatic life events and plucked up the courage to inform my oblivious OH about the trouble I was in. TBH I thought he would leave me as our relationship was and still is pretty rocky but he was surprisingly supportive. However, I did not tell him the extent of our debt, which at the time amounted to in excess of Ј110k.

With equity in our house we took out a secured loan for the maximum they would lend and were left with approx Ј45k of debt. This seemed like a better alternative to a DMP as my job is in danger if my insolvency gets discovered.

However, I did not think things through properly, truly believing stupidly that a shopaholic could become a complete non-spender overnight. Not on your nellie.

So we advance to July 2011 and LBM number 2. Realising after 4 years of struggling, things were rapidly getting worse, I wrote to all our creditors and offered them a reduced monthly repayment. It was a hard struggle to begin with, with the debts initially going up instead of down, whilst they placed charges and interest on the debts when I failed to pay them the minimum balances.

However, eventually I got all bar one to agree to freeze interest and charges and all to accept my reduced payments, to be reviewed in January. I worked out yesterday that I will be debt free in 2024, which although scary is sooner than I ever thought would happen. I'm also fairly determined to make it happen sooner than that and am sure I will succeed.

Best answers:

• So as I continue down this long and tedious road, I hope I will pick up some friends along the way.
  I can't write a really diary, in fear of my OH discovering it. I know its awful that I'm still hiding things from him but I'm trying to keep us together and know that this would be the final straw. he's pretty insensitive at times and although he has benefited from my overspends, he has absolutely no understanding as to how I ended up in a financial mess.
  I feel the need to write this diary as I'm trying to cope with this on my own and have things I need to get off my chest now and again and can't talk to him about them.
  The most recent event was when MBЈA, who had accepted my low repayment offer and froze interest transferred my debt to a DCA. They wrote to me informing me that they wanted Ј3949 immediately and kindly provided me with their website details so I could pay them in full. "Whistle dixie if you want but you can't have what I ain't got"
  Anyway, MBЈA had told me not to worry about this as they would forward all my correspondence to the DCA. Ha, oh no they didn't.
  So I rang the DCA, one off chat, follow up correspondence to be in writing only and tried to explain my situation. Ha, stupid "Emanuel did not want to hear my tales of woe and was not the least interested to hear of my drop in household income, he just wanted my money.
  Explaining that no action would be taken and all charges and interest were frozen, he seemed to think he was being kind when he told me I had some time to evaluate my situation to come up with the money - in a whole 3 weeks. Oh, how so very kind of you, I uttered, I will go and find that spare cash that has been invisibly floating around my house over the last year unbeknownst to me and post it to you tout de suite. Stupid man, I went off in a tirade of words, explaining my situation in words of one syllable as the poor man seemed to have understanding difficulties. His response at the end? Put it in writing - DONE so I await with baited breathe for the next installment of what I believe will be a rocky relationship.
  Next please
  BFN - me and anyone else who may join me.
  I'm living the life of the Bruno Mars Lazy song today
• Just had some really good news pop up in my inbox. Instead of an Easter Egg this year I got my OH to buy me some skincare products that I fancied. He paid Ј10 to get 3 items on 3 for 2 with 3 x Ј5 vouchers in them, so really free.
  However when I looked at the vouchers they had expired a month before.
  Now before this month I would have been cross and thrown them away.
  However, I decided to chance my luck and complain to the well known chemist, not really expecting much from them at all. Well, today I have had an email off them confirming they have credited the relevant value, in points, to my points card.
  So happy as this will help to buy DD a birthday pressie for her up and coming special birthday. I would have had to use the vouchers separately and on only one brand of skincare. Now I get to use the points in one go and anywhere in the store.
  Yey me. Off to read some more DFD to gather some more hints and tips on my journey to good financial health
• Nice to see you started a diary, I've subscribed.
  Great things come from little starts.
• Hi G so nice of you to join me. Had my first recorded NSD today, although a bit of a cheat as I didn't go out. However, pre LBM I didn't need to go out to spend as that's what the internet is for isn't it?
  Anyway, had a fairly lazy day after spending the night lurking around other MSE'ers diaries until the ungodly hours, so it was probably quite easy not to spend. Planning another one tomorrow despite having my DGDs over to play.
  Planned to list on ebay for the first time today but didn't get around to it. Will sort the stuff out and take the photos and write the descriptions, ready for the next free/low listing day.
  Hope you've had a good productive weekend with your family. When are you off back to London?
  BFN, join me again soon Gx2 x
  oo just realised I've gained my 1st star and am not a newbie any more - Yey go me
• Welcome to the boards. Good luck on your journey. Would it help you to fill in this statement of affairs calculator so that you know you have budgeted for everything?
  https://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html
  We also might be able to make suggestions of where you can make some more savings, so you have more to throw at the debt.
  chev
• Thanx for the tip Chev. I'd seen the SOA calculator but its a bit difficult for me to change much in my expenses at the moment as OH is not dealing with this matter very well and is still pretty oblivious to our situation. Despite my trying to raise it with him.
  I've been very MSE over the last year, getting the best deals we can for all our essential bills. The money I've saved goes in my terra mundi to be put towards a F&F when full. The only way I'm going to have more to throw at our debts is to make a little extra income rather than cutting back our expenses. I have a couple of ideas and have also told my OH that I will not be paying for any treats like holidays or meals out, so if he wants to keep up with these activities then he has to pay for them.
  I don't control the food shopping budget as my OH does most of the cooking, he's a bit of a control freak and likes his kitchen to himself - fine by me I hasten to add. He pays it out of his income anyway, which is pretty good at the moment cos he's had a bit of overtime lately but to be fair he is pretty good at the shop anyway so probably spends less than I would if I took charge of it. As said in my earlier post, unfortunately he considers this financial mess to be my problem and is being un-supportive about it tbh. With our marriage so rocky I haven't got the energy or inclination to kick up a fuss and as long as my creditors continue to play fair I'll get there slowly but surely on my own and feel proud with myself for doing so
  BFN Gx2
  I've done a SOA for my creditors and touch wood it seems to be working at the mo.
• Hey Gx2
  I know you say you have already cut back on the expenses you can, but posting an SOA is still a good idea. You would be surprised at what others pick out. I had already cut back when I did mine, but the tips from others still gave me extra ways to cut back .
  Go on, you know you want to.
  Seriously though, lots of people are reluctant to put it down on paper for a few reasons
  1. fear of being rumbled
  2. fear of seeing what it looks like
  All I'm saying is take a deep breath and have a think about it at least xx
• OK another morning in and I have to admit that my new obsession is DFDs on MSE. A much better use of my time than FB games I hasten to add.
  Planning a productive day, writing that letter to the creditor "halif*x" who have refused to stop interest and is the only one not to show as defaulted on my noodle account, despite my being about Ј2000 behind on payments.
  FFS don't they realise I want them to default as the sooner they do, the quicker they will disappear off my file.
  Anyway I fought M/S re a restructuring loan and finally got them to agree to no charges/interest and low payments for a year, so now hoping Halif*x will do the same.
  Managed to get a better deal on our Home insurance yesterday, halved the premium and the saving is going in my F&F savings to make an offer to someone later this year.
  DGD2 is coming over at 12 and then we'll pick DGD1 up from school at 3 and have some Quality Granny time.
  BFN til later Gx2 x
• Well letter done and another NSD under my belt today. Hoping to have another one tomorrow as I haven't got much money in my purse until the end of the month, so the more NSDs I have this month the better. Have to get up early in the morning to wash my hair and then make my lunch for work, as didn't make it today. Busy busy Granny with my 2 little darlings all afternoon.
  Made my new great nephew 2 cardigans today and finished off the ones I made for my 2 DGDs. Only cost me Ј6 for the 4 and that includes the buttons, so very MSE.
  Really pleased with them all, especially 1 of the 1s for new GN
  Now making hot pink one for DGD1, colour was her choice and should have enough wool left over to do 1 for DGD2 too. I find knitting very therapeutic and love seeing the end results.
  Anyway, off to work tomorrow, long day planned so an early night is on the cards for me tonight.
  BFN Gx2 x
• Not much to report today except I forgot to post that letter and to book my hair appointment. Purchased a Groupon voucher in Jan, which expires on Monday and just found out I may have to go away this weekend for work. Silly, silly Granny.
  Must get on to it tomorrow.
  Also got restaurant voucher that has to be used by Monday, so if OH not working double shift tomorrow/Thurs will make use of that. Otherwise may give it to DS and DDIL2B.
  Another NSD today and should have 1 tomorrow and Thurs too as working from home office. If going to restaurant OH will pay for drinks as I paid for voucher. So that's a good week this week.
  Will spend money this weekend but can be claimed back on expenses so not too bad, just hope it comes through quick as I don't get paid until the end of the month.
  Almost finished the pink cardi for DGD1 and its really pretty.
  Anyway, promised myself I'd have an earlyish night today and its nearly midnight already so night night.
  BFN Gx2 x
• Just taking a break from work, having logged on 2 hours ago. About to make myself a nice cup of soothing peppermint tea because I'm feeling a tad grumpy today. I have absolutely no reason, that I can think of, for feeling this way, but even so!!!!
  Note to self, cheer up you grumpy old mare
  In an effort to cheer myself up I've just calculated my % of paid off debt since LBM and it comes to 6.718%, yey me.
  I know my DFD is currently a long way off but like most things in life, if a thing's worth doing, do it properly, Rome wasn't built in a day, as they say.
  Having checked my noodle account yesterday, my secured debt is lower than I thought, only by Ј3k but better lower than higher. We have absolutely no equity in the house and no assets of value, makes me kinda wonder how I ended up in this sorry state.
  Not really as just how many pairs of black trousers and black cardigans can 1 Granny need exactly!! I could clothe a whole nation and still have enough clothes to wear for a month
  Still lessons learnt, I can't remember the last time I woke up feeling Grumpy and didn't resort to shopping to cheer myself up. Instead I find myself on here chatting happily to me.
  Over the last year, everything I have bought has been paid for in cash and my debts have gone down not up for the first time in 20 years. Yey me.
  DGD2s birthday next week and I've bought her a pull along toy, a baby and a baby's high chair, all in the sales and put away in my cupboard so I didn't give them to her early and have to buy her something else. In the past I would have tried to keep up appearances with her other grandparents, who are 14 years older than me, mortgage free with none of my life's mishaps behind them. (oi Granny, now stop with the feeling sorry for yourself - note to self - virtual bottom kick.) No more silly granny, well on the money front anyway.
  Just think by the time I reach their age I too will be debt, including mortgage, free, YEY GO Me.
  There, now I've grumped away to myself, I feel a bit better and am off to drink my tea and get back to work.
  Just thought of a sweet little nugget of advice I got from DGD1 on Monday. She asked why she couldn't stay over and I explained I had to go to work early on Tuesday. She asked why and I said to earn money. She said why don't you get some off Grampa, to which I replied because he hasn't got any either. Her advice? Well when you go to work tomorrow, get lots of money and then you can stay home and play with me all day.
  Oh right, is that all I have to do, ok, now where did work leave the combination to that magic money pot
  Anyway BFN til later Gx2 x
• Well I got through the rest of today, spending most of it feeling really out of sorts for no clear reason.
  Now my internet has decided to pack in, for again no clear reason, so really not helping my grumpiness. Luckily got a wireless dongle, courtesy of work so using that for a quick MSE DFD fix.
  Managed to have a NSD which was good as even though I haven't inflicted my grumping self on the outside world today, in the past I would have just online shopped.
  Today, I worked until 8pm and managed to get a horrid time consuming task out of the way. May as well hide myself away in my office all day so I don't end up arguing with OH. Gosh I sound like a right mare today!!!!!!!!
  I contacted Groupon re my hair voucher and "explained", (well ok lied) that I was unable to redeem it as I had left the area. Excellent customer service, credit back to my groupon account, no questions asked.
  We didn't go to restaurant tonight as OH decided he'd rather go tomorrow, which annoyed me a bit as I'd rather have gone tonight to cheer myself up a bit. Never mind, got something to look forward to tomorrow now instead - see I told you I was still feeling Grumpy.
  Stupidly answered my phone today, having emailed my SOA and letter to Halif*x. They rang to discuss my situation as apparently, (like hell), I'd defaulted on my agreement to pay. Well I ask you, how can I have defaulted on something that was never set up in the first place. Anyway, I've made every SO payment since notifying them of my change of circs last July. Eventually the lovely debt advisor informed me that her colleague had clearly read my data incorrectly and that I hadn't defaulted at all. She kindly set me up on a reduced interest, (now 0.5% apr, instead of 5.6%), reduced agreement for 6 months and confirmed the account will be sent to their legal team in the next month. Once this happens, it will default, which means no interest or charges can be added. There is obviously a chance that they won't accept my offer of Ј92pm but as its pretty close to the minimum repayment amount, I'm hoping they will. If they don't accept it, they'll get nothing as I've got no assets of value, live in a house in negative equity and would lose my job if declared bankrupt. So not really a good solution for them.
  Actually discussed, (well ok talked at) the conversation with OH tonight and despite wearing a glazed look and making no obvious sign of interest or understanding, he appeared to take his head out of the sand for a bit.
  Anyway, off to lurk some other DFDs and then log off this dongle and go to bed. Hopefully I will wake up in a better mood.
  BFN Gx2 x
• Thanks for the advice G, I will go back to them today and chance my luck.
  Thank goodness I have woken up in a better mood today. I hate feeling as out of sorts as I did yesterday, but it did have its advantages. Not only did I get that horrid task off my desk, I spoke to, (OK talked at, as spoke to involves some interaction from him) my OH about our struggles and took no nonsense from Halif*x when they rang.
  Just found out I won Ј10 on the lottery last night. I know that I maybe should not play it but I only play 1 line, 2 a week and win more than Ј100 a year. I live in hope that I'll win big one day.
  That Ј10 will come in handy this month and then I'll pay it back into my F&F pot for later this year when I get paid.
  I got my internet back today, rebooted my router, and hey presto.
  Anyway, more work to do. NSD planned again, I'm on a roll this week.
  BFN Gx2 x
• I am really proud of myself, I've had 5 recorded NSDs in a row and that Ј20 note is still sitting snug as a bug in my purse.
  Hoping to have another 1 tomorrow, actually I'm challenging myself to do as many as possible. Nothing like a bit of healthy competition between Granny and her purse. Before long, who knows, the moths might actually set up home in there.
  Had another productive home working day, but logged off at 5 ready to go out.
  Ha, plan foiled, OH decided he'd rather go tomorrow as then he can have a drink and as I'm going away early on Saturday, I can drive - Oh what joy.
  Never mind, I've already packed a bottle of Rioja, (sorry Pinot, if you make your way over here), to take with me to keep me company and it'll be mine, all mine, with noone to share it with me. Sweet joy. me x
  Not much other money busting done today, other than a phone call from my previous home insurance offering to lower their original price by Ј50. Ha, if you could do that, you should have done it in the first place cos now the Granny has gone elsewhere and got cashback and even more off for the privilege.
  Finished DGD1s pink cardi today, it is so pretty I'm really pleased. Adapted another pattern, so its designer Granny. Still got loads of wool left, from car boot sale last year, so going to make DGD2 one next.
  Oh well, nothing much else to report, so off to lurk on someone else's DFD.
  BFN Gx2 x (or if Pinot arrives Gx3 )
• Morning Grannyx2
  I found my way to you from Gargrave50 and just wanted to say hi.I get the feeling im going to enjoy reading your diary,we have a few things in common
  im nanny to 2 dgd
  i have an Ostrich for a OH
  and im in debt too.
  I look forward to supporting you on your journey..
  I blog so if you fancy following me a link should be on the contact info by my user name.