Mini meltdown and light bulb moment

A question about : Mini meltdown and light bulb moment

Hi everyone,
I posted on the forum yesterday and after some soul searching, I have contacted Step Change and am now in the initial stages of sorting a Debt Management Plan. The guy was really helpful, and said I am definitely taking the right steps for the circumstances, and I need to put me first.
To get it all out in the open and off my chest is going to be the second box ticked on my 'getting my life on track' checklist.
Number one was admitting that I cannot do this any more. I can't work full time any more, and I can't carry on getting in debt to pay debt.
With my health deteriorating, I knew I needed to do something, but knew too that I just could not afford part time wages.
I've figured it out so that I can reduce my hours by one day a week, meaning less sick days overall, so not too much of a pay reduction, but still less money than I need to service my debts with the increasing interest.
So, Step Change are putting me on Debt Management Plan, it will take me a long time to pay it all off, but least it will be manageable, affordable and I wont have any more mini meltdowns.

The next step is to have a big chat with the OH, which is the part I'm looking forward to the least. I married him knowing he has an IVA, and that he has 'around Ј15000' of debt, but I have no idea about anything else, when it will be paid off, how much he's paying, etc, so I want us to sit and have an open chat about the complete bigger picture, so that we can really start to get to grips with everything. I also want to encourage him to embrace being more frugal, I have really tried, I've saved on food shopping by cooking from scratch, with using up what we have, and selling things on ebay to raise money for Christmas, but he's bought a coffee machine, sofa cushions and a wii U, which has thoroughly CHEESED ME OFF. So, a big chat is needed there. (to be fair, I agreed to the Wii U, he had a bonus from work and we have sold the Wii).
I already feel a bit better, I'm off to Barclays this afternoon to set up a 'basic cash card account' so that I can transfer my PayPal funds and start my (long) debt free journey.
I will try and update here when I can, but figures as at today are (taken off my Noddle credit report, not called for accurate balances from bank or CC company):
Loan Ј2176
OD Ј1050 (this is my OD limit, no idea how far into it I am, I daren't look!)
N CC Ј2389
H CC Ј1971
TOTAL Ј7586.
I am so looking forward to having a bank account without a negative balance!!

Best answers:

• Good luck, I'm subscribing
  Mm
• Good luck, subscribed, and look forward to reading about your journey
  I too cannot work full time for health reasons, but the time at home can help keep the housekeeping down.
• Good luck, hopefully life will less stressful soon, that in itself will be helpful in creating your new budget and being able to stick to it. There are lots of people on here now living a "pared down" life and actually enjoying the challenge once they have had the light bulb moment.
• Happy shiny new diary
• So, I went in to Barclays today to set up a basic account, I got asked a few questions about my current bank, then got told an appointment has been booked for next Thursday! I really need to send the paperwork off to Stepchange to get the ball rolling, but I don't have a 'new' bank account to use yet. They also advised me to cancel direct debits and standing orders servicing the debts, but I'm a bit scared to do this if I dont have another account to shift my money to :s
  Its all a bit scary. I've spoken to my mum about it all, she's really supportive and really thinks its for the best. Still not had a proper chat with the OH, I asked him to print the paperwork off for me at work but he seemed quite against the idea (of the plan, not the printing!), but hasn't elaborated. Ho hum, will keep working on him. I actually really think that I should know more about his financial status, I'm married to him and share a house with him but we just don't talk about money (or our obvious lack of...)
  About to log on to my bank to see how much of my wages I have left since getting paid 4 days ago! Quite nervous, not logged on to my internet banking for a while as I'm a bit scared about what I'll see! I know that needs to change!!
• Been reading through Bonglecats Debt free diary and its inspired me and got me thinking.
  I think I need to get the new Barclays account open next week and start using it as a priority, then perhaps open a secondary account with Lloyds or Natwest as a 'joint bills account' but don't think we can have a joint account because of OH's IVA.
  We'll see.
• I have spent hours and hours reading through some of the debt free diaries, why I haven't stumbled across them before I'll never know! I like the idea of listing what I spend each day, but recently I've been having NSW's instead of NSDs!!
  Three people have left work recently, and I had thought about cancelling the leaving meal, but having looked at my paypal, I will use Ј24 from there to round down my paypal balance to Ј100, (I was putting this aside for Christmas,) but as I now have free listings again on ebay I can get some more things sold to make up the Ј25 again.
  I am auditing some accounts for my manager, and once they're submitted I'll get Ј100 for doing them, so this can go either in the christmas fund, or towards debt repayments.
  How many accounts do people have? At the moment I have just one current account that is overdrawn constanly, my wages dont even take it out of the overdraft, and a basic savings account that I never use that has had about Ј6 in it for the past two years!
  I have just logged in to online banking for the second time in as many days, I usually avoid it at all costs, and I've withdrawn the Ј7.95 in savings (woop, more than I thought I had) and paid it to my N Credit Card. Not a lot, but its a start.
  I've been thinking more and more about money management, and seeing people use different accounts and different 'pots' of money, like back in the day I guess, I can see where I've been going wrong and how the debts have accrued, just spending on one debit card, using credit cards when the debit card declines, and not budgeting AT ALL.
  Still not had a proper chat with OH yet, I'm working up to it.
  After checking my account online, the live balances as at today after the small payment from savings are:
  Loan Ј1973.50
  N CC Ј2373.96
  Overdraft Ј681.77
  H CC Ј1855.46
  TOTAL - Ј6884.69
  I had to call H to get the balance, as I don't get statements through and can't check online, (I changed address and got married and when I try to update my details with them they keep telling me there is a system error and to call back), anyway, it appears that they've INCREASED my credit limit!! I owe less than I thought but I have an available balance of Ј1294.54 which is NOT good! Why do they do this?!
  I know this looks like a good reduction from my original figures (I've edited that first post because I think the figures on my credit report which I took them from were slightly behind), but I think I need to add on next months interest to these amounts? I guess this is why I never know where I am because I don't know which 'balance' is correct! Its so frustrating.
  Anyway, I'm happy that the balances seem to have gone down since I last posted, but thats because the payments have gone out. (the overdraft figure is how much I am now overdrawn, the original figure in my first post was the total amount of my overdraft limit)
• Went out for the meal last night. Earlier in the day I went in to the bank to withdraw exactly Ј25, I usually would have just gone to the cashpoint and got Ј30. Total spend last night was Ј22, Ј3 under budget because I got a lift, and had tap water with the meal, then my friend bought me a lemonade.
  So far today I've spent Ј2.40 on bus fair and had beans on toast at work. Bought in a bottle of cordial from home to drink instead of buying a bottle/can each day, so I'm proud of myself for that. Got a Ј5 note left in my purse which will do for 2 days bus fare next week, in case I can't get a lift.
  Feeling really exhausted today, so bath and pj's on when I get home from work, then I'm going to finish auditing the accounts for my manager so I can claim the Ј100 payment, which will definitely go into the Christmas fund/PayPal.
• Its definitely not going to be a NSD today, as I have to transfer the money across to the venue for my sisters hen do in 2 weeks time, I've got the money in paypal and cash in an envelope, going to transfer it from my bank account as this is going to be in the DMP overdraft anyway (I know thats naughty!) Once its all transferred across, there will be nothing to pay for on the day, so I don't have to budget anything else for it.
  Got a hospital appointment on Monday so will need change for the car park, I will just take a 'late lunch' so I can leave work early without having to have time deducted, so quick beans on toast again for work on Monday.
• Good luck with everything. Your diary is only a couple of days older than mine and you're the first I have subscribed to. Maybe we can keep each other motivated.
  Deb xx
• Hi AleMrsT, found you and subscribed You're doing great so far!
• So, I heard from a recruiter today about a job vacancy in my village. Even though it's technically more hours than I do now, it will be a shorter week and shorter days,because I now leave the house at 8.10 and get home after 6 most days, because it's in the village I'll be leaving home at the same time as I do now, but I'll be home at least an hour earlier, and I won't be doing 6 day weeks at all. Same salary, more holidays, company pension and bonus scheme, I don't get any of that now. The recruiter is contacting them to discuss my medical needs and will let me know if they will consider me. OH has said to go for it, the benefits outweigh the fact that it is still full time, and it means I won't have to reduce my wage. More importantly, it's a 2 minute walk so no Ј2.50 a day bus fare spend.
  Something to think about.
  In other news, nipped to the small supermarket in town to get, and I quote, 'potatoes, an onion, washing up liquid and frozen chips'. A basket full later and purse is Ј37 lighter. OH just can't help himself getting yogurts, biscuits and just rubbish we don't need! I can't do the shopping on my own, I don't have the energy to carry everything by myself.
  So I'm not happy. Nothing else spent though and least we have snacks for the car journey on Friday and I have more soup and beans for work lunches.
• So, balances as at today's date (getting a bit obsessed with checking, for someone who had to blow dust off the online banking card reader.....)
  N CC Ј2402.35
  Loan Ј1750.07
  O/Draft Ј930.20
  H CC Ј1891.80
  Total Ј6974.42
  Nothing spent at the hospital, was in and out within half an hour so free parking! Woop.
• Many sympathies - I have a partner that fills our trolley with crap. Its like shopping with a toddler :-P
• The recruiter emailed me again today about the job, the company can't accommodate the frequency of my hospital appointments and potential sickness absense because they already have staff on college days etc, which is why they are looking to recruit in the first place.
  Ah well. At least they've said they'll keep my details on file.
  I feel utterly useless, like I'd just be a burden so there's no use employing me. I know I'm over reacting but it's so frustrating!
  No spends to report today.
• Surely they can't rule you out just because of your medical issue, that's discrimination?
  Something better will come along, positive thinking.
  Mm
• Sorry to hear about the job. Something else will come along which will suit you much better. for the NSD.