How to help my mother become more independant

A question about : How to help my mother become more independant

Trying to keep this short.

Basically my parents split up last year, dad has always paid the bills for her house (as he is still doing now) so her income,mwhich is small as she seems unwilling to do much more than a couple of half days at work a week, is pretty much disposable and she has never ever saved anything, I'm trying, completely in vain to encourage her to save a bit every month but to no avail. She only has to buy food and fill her car with petrol and the East just seems to be spent on rubbish from charity shops.

I just don't know how to help her.

Best answers:

• Does your mother have any interests that might be encouraged?
• Does she have a busy social life?
• I can see why you're struggling because so am I! Does she have grandchildren that can be used as a distraction?
• Nope sadly not, it's like there's nothing to encourage her to save so she spends it on rubbish rather than thinking long term, I've tried to encourage her to do more work but I suppose she has been so used to doing the minimum all this time it's a big change for her.
• It's great that you are supporting her, but she's an adult. She is now on a very limited income, so it's time to grow up.
  I doubt her ex-husband will pay her bills forever.
• I would describe it as banging your head against a brick wall.
• Sounds like she's happy to make do and isn't going to change unless her circumstances force her to.
• You call it "her house" - obviously I don't know who owns the house and what the circumstances are.
  If it's jointly owned, or if he owns it, at some stage, your father may decide to stop paying the bills and sell the house.
  Until then, your Mum may be holding out the hope that they reconcile and that if she carries on as normal, then everything will be all right.
  Head in the sand ostrich style is not a good look.
  It may have to reach some crisis point before she realises that she needs to change her ways.
• My Mothers been doing that most of her single life and she's in her 80's. As long as she is happy and healthy, I am happy to let her enjoy it whilst she still can.